No Reply
by Autumn E
Summary: Did you ever wonder what Spike and Julia were like? What drove Vicious over the edge? Here are the answers... Updated. Review.
1. The Secret Keeper

"Sing for me please... just like that," he said trying to lift his bandaged face up from the pillow that comforted his nightmare sleep. He awoke to the most entrancing vision of beauty, a ray of light shining brightly in his painful existence. Her blonde hair fell into her face as the humming ceased. She smiled down at him, pushing a strand of hair from her eyes. She couldn't help but be lost in the intense almond colored eyes that gazed longingly into her own. She started singing again, the words distinct and clear, passionate and beautiful, the music ran through his soul as he never experienced it before.  
  
Don't care for me / Don't cry / Let's say goodbye / Adieu / It's time to say goodbye / I know that in time it will just fade away / Its time to say Goodbye  
  
She smiled at him again, putting away the bandages and rinsing out a bowl in the sink nearby, all the while continuing to sing. Everyday from then on was like that, from the moment he woke up till whenever he fell asleep he begged her to sing to him, giving her the slick smile that had worked wonders on all the other women he met. She sang and sat, watching his sleeping face, praying for the chance to see his eyes again. They burned into her and made her feel so strange, no words could explain it.  
  
"We will get our revenge," a voice hissed from the other end of the room, causing Spike to stir in his sleep. He knew that voice, but at the moment the face that went with it completely escaped him.  
"He had at least three bullet wounds, his head was smashed up pretty bad too," it was the voice of an angel ringing in his ears. "We're very lucky he stumbled here."  
"You never cease to amaze me," this hissing came again.  
"Vicious, please, it's my job to help people..."he opened his eyes to see her smiling coyly at the tall, silver haired man..  
"You have to come work for the Syndicate now, you've shown more dedication than we could ask you to," he said, laying a hand on her shoulder.  
"I don't know how much I can help you," she shook her head, her beautiful blonde hair falling into her face as her eyes focused on the ground.  
"I've seen what you can do to men, your eye for detail and organization that never fails us," he wrapped his arms around her waist. "You can't refuse my request."  
She nodded, Spike tried to find some hesitation in her eyes. He moved his head to the left and that's when Vicious eyes laid on him.  
"It seems as though he's waking," he walked to the bedside and stared down at him.  
"Hello, Vicious," Spike said confidently, with all the strength he could muster. He nodded.  
"We know who it was that attacked you, some members from the White Tigers, apparently pissed off that we dealt with all the Gate issues - they wanted the money..." he set a glass of water at the bedside table. "We have already sent countless men after them, not one of them will go unpunished for what has happened to you."  
Julia walked out of the room, both men watched her leave and a silence settled over them.  
"She's beautiful," Vicious said with his eyes still lingering on the doorway. Spike nodded. "She's going to join us, you'll have to help me train her, and help her fall for me..."  
A twisted smiled filled his face and Spike just nodded in quiet approval. It felt as though something was ending before it was beginning, but he wasn't sure what was happening. He closed his eyes as Vicious talked to him, the words faded off into the distance, echoing on the walls of the tiny room. He fell asleep again.  
  
It was a week later that he felt the strength of his legs carrying him towards the Syndicate headquarters. The beautiful women ahead of him and his best friend at his side. She was dressed in black, her skin strikingly pale against the outfit, her eyes a brighter blue than he had ever imagined.  
"How are you feeling?" Vicious asked as they walked into the dining room.  
"Tired..."  
"Well, that's normal for you," he said walking towards the head of the table. Spike took the first seat he could find, only to find her sitting down next to him. She smiled and placed the napkin gently on her lap.  
"You look much better," she said softly. He didn't feel that much better until she spoke to him.  
"None of it would have been possible without your assistance," he smiled and she hid her face behind a layer of her hair.  
"You're an extremely strong person," she smiled. "I've never seen someone take so many injuries and come out of it alive."  
"It wasn't my time to go... What's your name? I never did get a chance to properly introduce myself," he smiled offering his hand to her.  
"I'm Julia," she took his hand, he didn't want to let go of the perfectly soft skin that caressed his rough and worn hands. They lingered a little longer than normal, staring into each others eyes.  
"Julia, I want to introduce you to Mao..." Spike saw him place his hand on the small of her back, and jealousy ripped through him.  
"Vicious," he said, the silver hair whipped around to look at him. "Are the Elders going to be here tonight?"  
"No," he shook his head and started walking towards the head table again. Spike watched the two of them from his seat, the way the Vicious looked at her and always touched her. Whether it was her shoulder or her back, or his fingers running through her hair, he was always touching her. Spike played with the lighter, flicking it on and off and subconsciously running his finger through the flame. Her smiled never faded, he couldn't tell if her feelings for Vicious were equal, she never touched him, she hardly looked at him. She came back to the table, Mao waved at Spike when his eyes roamed to Julia's sitting place, he nodded to acknowledge his presence and watched as Vicious sat down at the head table.  
"Is he going to eat up there?" Spike asked not looking up at her, but focusing on his cigarette.  
"Yeah, it seems that way," she smiled. He blew the smoke away from her and leaned in closer, offering her a cigarette. "No thank you."  
"Ah, you're one of those healthy types, I forgot," he grinned.  
"You got me..."her eyes glittered across his face for a moment before she looked back up to the head table. He'd never felt this way before, it was as though everything in the world only revolved around her, he could see nothing else.  
"Well, I have to say you're not that hard to figure out," he still moved closer. "Sweet and innocent, not completely tainted by the darkness of the world. One of those beautiful women who can get whatever she wants by batting her eyelashes, making a man believe that he's lost in the ocean of her eyes... though you won't use your power yet. You're waiting for something, you care about other dangerously."  
She looked up at him, almost in shock. "I don't know whether that was suppose to be complimentary or not."  
"Which part?" He asked smoothly.  
"All of it..."  
"You're beautiful."  
She was silent.  
"You're not so hard to figure out either Mr. Spiegel," she played with a ring on one of her fingers. "A good looking man who has had to struggle his entire life, the usual Syndicate man who has no real feeling towards any one thing. You will do anything to get what you want, nothing can stand in your way. You try hard to hide all of your emotions by acting sarcastic, collected, and calm. Yet in you're eyes there is this power to love, you just don't know it."  
He laughed.  
"You don't think you're that way?" She asked, leaning back in her chair.  
"Not completely," he shrugged.  
"I know all your weaknesses," she smiled. "You told me everything while you were sleeping."  
Inside he was full of wonder and shock, but outside he lifted an eyebrow and turned to his glass of whiskey.  
"Here's to you," he raised the glass. "My Secret Keeper." 


	2. Its You

Her eyes followed him when he moved around the room. He seemed so calm, when she would have been nervous he handled everything with ease. His sarcastic smile enraptured her, and a few times he looked over at her and winked, catching her watching him. She threw her hair behind her back and turned in the other direction, Vicious was standing in his long back overcoat talking in whispers to the man next to him. He never smiled, and it was hardly ever that his eyes became warm when he held her or looked at her. Her eyes rested on the floor. She had been with him so much lately that she was beginning to wonder what life would be without him. He promised her everything, but never gave her the one thing she wanted. She wanted to feel safe in his arms and have him look at her like he really cared. At times she felt like she was nothing to him. He never touched her in front of others, and the higher he began to rise in the Syndicate the more and more distance he placed between the two of them in the public eye.  
"Julia," she felt his cold hands on her shoulder. She looked up at him. "You're going to go with Spike, I'll meet you guys tomorrow at the drop off point."  
She nodded and stood up, rubbing her hands against her legs. Spike began walking out the door and she followed, use to his casual way of going about things. They got in the car and began the journey that change both of them forever.  
He lit a cigarette. "Do you mind?"  
"Do you care?" she asked with a smirk.  
"Nope, not really," he raised an eyebrow, returning her smirk. She sat back and watched the scenery pass them by.  
"How long will it take to get to the lift off point?" she asked with her eyes glued to the window.  
"An hour from here," he shifted the gear.  
"An hour is this cramped up car," she shifted in her seat.  
"Yeah, you're stuck in this piece of shit with me," he took a drink from his flask.  
"You shouldn't drink and drive,"she looked up at him only half serious.  
"That's just one of the twentieth century Earth myths," he took another drink.  
"I'll take that," she reached over and took it out of his hands, he didn't protest as he usually would.  
"So..." he tried to think of conversation. "How are things between you and Vicious?"  
She sighed.  
"That good, huh?" He smiled.  
"I just don't know what to think anymore, it feels almost as though he's lost intrest completely. I try so hard to make him happy but it's almost like he-"  
"- Doesn't want to," Spike finished the sentence. "Vicious is a Syndicate kid, its very hard to get him to feel anything. We were taught to feel nothing."  
"Its smart, getting caught up in all of this I don't want to feel anything," she shook her head.  
"In time you'll learn not to," he shrugged his shoulder and flicked ashes of his cigarette to the ground. He saw the glimmer in her eye fade slightly as she looked at him, taking in his last few words. "Why did you get involved with someone like him anyway? Why did you come to the Syndicate?"  
"I've been alone, struggling to find my way through this universe. Vicious offered me a home and a job if I could pass his tests, if I could show that I was trustworthy," she looked up in front of her. " I was so sure that I was going to feel complete. Vicious seemed so strong and that was something that I wasn't at the time."  
"Do you, like, love him," he said rolling his eyes at the use of the word. She shrugged her shoulders.  
"No, but he doesn't love me either," she looked up at Spike.  
"At least you know that," Spike exhaled the smoke from his lungs. He could see how the truth coming from someone else's mouth stung her, part of him thought she needed it, the other part wanted to reach out and take her hand, touch her face. Show her that he cared. He knew caring was the last thing that he needed to do, so instead he stayed silent and the rest of the drive remained quiet.  
  
He looked at her sleeping in the chair next to her, and then to the aircraft off in the distance. He didn't want to wake her because he knew she would need all the sleep she could get, this mission would drain every inch of energy from both of them. He shook her shoulder and said her name, he didn't want to touch her too long, or get to close, he could help but be swept away by her skin.  
Her cell phone ran just then and she jumped up, pulling it out of her bag.  
"Hello?" she looked up at Spike. "No I didn't... I swear that I didn't. Vicious please don't... I can't tell you that now. What?! Vicious..."  
She looked up at Spike. He looked away from her and walked towards the ship in the distance. She watched as smoke loomed over his mess of hair.  
"Fine..." she hung up the phone and instantly she heard Spikes phone go off.  
  
"Is she crying?" Vicious asked.  
"No." Spike replied.  
"Damn..."  
"What exactly are you trying to accomplish?" Spike flicked ashes away.  
"I want to make her break. Test her."  
"Vicious -"  
"What Spike?"  
"Did you break up with her?" He shuffled his foot against the ground.  
"Yes."  
"On what pretense? She didn't do anything wrong?"  
"That's why I'm calling you..." Vicious went silent for a moment. There is no way he's going to ask me to do what I think he might, Spike thought in the silence. "When she comes back I need you to side with me so that I have a reason to break up with her, I'm having some Syndicate members set her up to look like she cheated on me. I just have to make her stronger Spike, you understand."  
"Who's going to be the one to say she did?"  
"Shin."  
"Fuck, Vicious, this is stupid."  
"Well, we will just have to see if this toughens her up. You are in, right?"  
Spike thought for a moment. "Yes."  
He hung up the phone just as Julia walked up next to him, he could smell her perfectly on the wind around him. They both stood watching the sun fade.  
"Can I have one of those?" she said pointing to his pack of cigarettes.  
He looked up at her and blew the smoke away. "No."  
"Why?" She looked shocked.  
"Because I just quit." And with that he threw the box to the ground and smashed it under his boot.  
  
They sat side by side in a tiny ship, flying quickly out of the atmosphere towards the star. She was messing with the monitor controls and he was cautiously steering them through to the gate. She seemed preoccupied, her eyes glinting with thoughts and frustrations as she moved around in her seat and settled back against it. He eyes fell on her hand, the ring that he remembered was now removed, and she was wringing them together in nervous frustration.  
"Julia -"  
"What did he say to you?" She looked up at him, he imaged her with tears in her eyes, but the moment he came back to reality he realized there were none.  
"Nothing about you," he shook his head.  
"Don't lie to me," she grabbed his face and looked into his eyes. He kept his eyes calm but inside he was furious, no one had ever been able to see through his lies. Her soft fingers dug into his chin and her turned away from her.  
"I have no reason to lie to you, he just wanted to talk about the mission," he replied trying to keep his anger under control.  
"I may be new at this but I'm certainly not stupid. I know you people, and I know that he is up to something, something that will make me look bad and I have a right to know what it is!" She pulled away from him.  
"You have no rights anymore, you gave your life away to this Syndicate and now you get to know what we want you to know when we want you to know," he gave her a stern look as her eyes narrowed, burning the lies he was concealing.  
"I thought I could trust - "  
"Don't trust anyone."  
  
They arrived in the evening and disappeared into their own separate rooms. He watched her as she slid into the broken down room of the hotel, and walked to the edge of the street. All he could think about was her, he had to sit down and think about the mission at hand for a moment. He reached for his pack only to realize that he had crushed it when they were taking off. He wanted to kick himself now for getting rid of the only thing that could calm his nerves, but then he remembered what made him do it. He wanted her with him, but he didn't want her to lose all of her innocence.  
He heard the creaking of leaves as someone walked towards him and he turned quickly holding a gun up in the direction behind him. The blonde hair caught his eyes and he lowered it slightly as she walked to him, handing him a drink and settling down on a rock. The sun was down, and the stars we shining brightly in the sky around them, the road was empty and it felt as though no one was around for miles. He looked at the cup she handed him, the clear liquid substance smelled bitter.  
"Thank you," he said and she waved her hand in reply. He sat down next to her, letting his hands hold his weight up as he leaned back.  
"He has me trapped," she whispered. "He lets me go without really doing it."  
Spike nodded.  
"He wants to know that emotions won't get in the way of your work."  
"He will never let that happen."  
"Probably not." He looked up at the sky. She leaned her head on his shoulder and he could feel his body tense up. She felt it too, because she moved her head immediately and looked up at him.  
"I'm sorry." She shook her head.  
"He doesn't pay very much attention to you," Spike guided her head back to his shoulder, trying not to look uncomfortable.  
"I'm lucky if I get a 'hello' and I'm not sure what I've done," she watched the road. She could feel him tense still. "You're not use to this."  
"Affection?" He laughed. "I've tried to stay as far away from it as possible. I'm just as bad at giving it as I am at receiving it."  
There was silence for a while.  
"It's not you Julia." He said quietly. "He doesn't know how to be that way, how to do anything that's not related to his work. He doesn't usually feel much of anything at all, don't think it's you."  
"I don't want to be with him," she looked up at Spike. She watched his eyes for a moment while they lingered on her own. "Your eyes..."  
He kept looking at her, trying to find that weakness inside of her. The one that Vicious was desperately trying to destroy.  
"They are -"  
"Different colors."  
"But its more than that." She shook her head, never once moving her eyes from his. He didn't dare move away from hers. "They make me feel like you can see everything. The future, the past, the present. Even..."  
"Your dreams."  
She nodded.  
"You make me feel alive." He whispered. As if reality suddenly hit her she looked away. He shook his head and stammered. "I mean your eyes... your eyes make me feel alive."  
She nodded again.  
"That is what I meant."  
"I believe you." She stood up and brushed the dirt from her pants. "I'm going to go back to the room and order some dinner."  
He looked up at her, damning himself inside. "Yeah, okay."  
"You want me to order you something?"  
"Sure. Something with protein."  
She smiled and walked back to the hotel. 


	3. Standing

"You're crazy!" she said turning away from him with a smile.  
"I get that all the time, but really, it will make you feel so much better," he reached out and pulled her towards him. She rolled her eyes.  
"That is not the way women like to cheer up!" She threw her hands up in the air.  
"Julia," he said seriously, looking down at her and holding one of her hands. "Just hit me."  
She laughed and turned back towards him.  
"What are you so afraid of? You said so yourself that you couldn't hurt me," he let go of her hand and stood ready.  
"Fine," she said leaning her head to one side letting her hair fall into her eyes. "But then will you leave me alone?"  
Before he could reply she threw a punch and it came crashing against his stomach.  
"Come on Spiegel, you weren't paying any attention," she threw another punch and he sprinted in the opposite direction. She went for the face but he caught her punch before it landed on him, he held her fist in his hands and smirked, her blue eyes filled with laughter. She used her other hand to push him away, and he teetered for a moment trying to keep his balance, still holding on to her fist.  
"I love a girl who can kick my ass," he looked at her.  
She moved away from him, letting her fist fall from his grasp and sitting on the edge of the bed.  
"Then I guess you don't love me, because that's the last of my talents," she took her black jacket off and quickly placed her hair in a bun.  
"You could kick my ass..." he said skeptically.  
"Yeah, if you let me do it," she stood up looking at the door. "Where is our food?"  
"I don't know," he shrugged. "What did you order me anyway?"  
She walked off to the bathroom and he heard her answer before the water started running.  
"Bell peppers and beef!"  
He sat on the edge of the bed where she had just been, her jacket threatening to fall over onto the floor. He picked it up and folded it neatly, looking around the room. She had only been there a few hours and already everything smelt like her. It was the aroma that made him leave the world he was once living in and see things in a new light, with a little bit of joy and a happiness he had never experience. He heard the creak of the door and looked up to see her standing there staring at her.  
"Worn out?" she asked him with a grin. "I know I beat you pretty hard."  
"Keep dreaming." He shook his crazy hair out of his face. There was a knock at the door and she went to get it, the smell of the food scrambling through as the man brought it in. She tipped him and sat down next to Spike. Both of them ate in silence for a while before Julia turned to look at him.  
"How long have you know Vicious?" She asked calmly.  
"Since I was twenty, when I first started with the Syndicate," he took another bite. "So about four years."  
"Has he always been this way?"  
"What? Scary? Yes he has."  
"Are you scared of him?" she looked at him.  
"No." He said quickly. "I know him too well, I know every move he makes when he fights, the way his mind works. If I had to out smart him I could.-"  
"And you have a better relationship with the higher powers of the Red Dragons," she looked down to her food.  
"Well I do, but that's not something I really consider -"  
"Vicious does, he talks about it all the time," she stirred her chopsticks inside the cup. Spiked nodded.  
"He's my best friend."  
"Do you trust him?" Spiked looked up at her when she asked this question, searching himself for an answer.  
"As much as I know how to trust a person."  
"You're nothing alike..."  
"We are the same person."  
"No," she shook her head. "I can see in your eyes the will to really live, his are empty and hopeless. You are so very different."  
"Is that good?"  
"Yes. Don't you think it is? To be capable of so much more than he is."  
"I don't think I was ever capable before..." He looked up to the ceiling.  
"Before what?"  
"Nothing," he shook his head. She put her head on his shoulder, only this time he remained still, perfectly comfortable. His fingers dared to run themselves through her hair, wanting to feel the silk against his skin. Her smell drifted through his mind and he tried so hard to resist the urge to put his arms around her, take her body and protect it against the evils he had known.  
"Why didn't I know you first?" she asked to no one in particular.  
"What does it matter who you knew first?"  
"It will matter in the future, I can feel it," she looked up at him, her eyes clear and pure. He felt his fingers run through her hair, while placing her head back against his shoulder. She fell calmly against him and closed her eyes, letting him comfort her with his touch. He leaned back, letting her head fall gently against his chest. He ran his finger through her hair until he blacked out and fell asleep. It wasn't until hours later that he woke up to find her lying on his chest still. Her hand placed on his arm, the softness of her touch caused him to sigh. He sat there thinking for a moment, why does this feel so wrong? Why do I want her so much? He was angry with himself for feeling so much for someone so wrong. For feeling anything at all. He subconsciously started running his hands through her hair again. He felt her move, her head tilted to look him in the eyes. Sleep still lingered in the lightness of them, she didn't smile but just looked, captivated by the way she felt inside his eyes. The way he saw her when he stared back at her.  
"We fell asleep." She laughed.  
"Yeah, I don't know how that happened. I didn't even finishing eating," he lifted his head up a little to look at the table still sitting by their feet. "Do you always laugh this much?"  
"No." She shook her head. "Its just you."  
"Good to know I'm your source for amusement," he patted her on the head.  
"Well, at least I'm not too cool to laugh," she rolled her eyes.  
"I'm not." He looked away from her.  
"Whatever you say," she patted him on the head. He took her hand and looked down at her with a smirk on his face.  
"You mess with the hair and you're in big trouble," he placed her hand on his chest and she ran her fingers gently over his arm, he felt tired and entranced all at the same time as she moved her fingers up and down his skin. He closed his eyes and instantly his mind filled with a thousand thoughts. He jumped up, startling her and paced around the room.  
"I have to do something..." he looked around, still trying to think of his excuse to leave. He threw his jacked over his shoulder and opened the door.  
"What?" she looked up at him questioningly.  
"Um..."  
"Do I make you nervous?"  
He looked at her for a moment.  
"No, it's just that I -"  
"You make me nervous." He turned back towards her and looked down at the ground while she spoke. "I don't know how to act with you, before I didn't even want to be alone with you and now I wonder if maybe I should have stayed away."  
He kneeled down next to her, taking her hand and rubbing the back of it with his thumb.  
"I have no idea what I'm doing, and you shouldn't... we shouldn't. Its just attraction. You're worth more than that."  
She nodded her head, the light in her eyes was slipping away slowly. He stood up.  
"We need to get some sleep anyway," she said walking him to the door. She opened it and stood there as he walked out.  
"Goodnight," he said.  
"Night," she smiled, closing the door as he walked away. She stood with her back against the wood, running her fingers against the rough surface and thinking about the perfect moments she had been sleeping. Suddenly there was a knock at the door, she turned quickly and opened it.  
"It's something about the way that you looked at me..." he said reaching his hand out for her face and looking into her eyes. "You frustrate me. Everything is going wrong inside my mind. This is all wrong."  
He said the words with stern passion, as though he meant everything, like he was reprimanding her for unintentionally crawling beneath his skin. Then, before she had a chance to reply or think about what he was saying, she felt his lips press gently against hers, his fingers run softly through her hair, and his hand place itself gently on her upper arm. Everything happened so fast that she didn't have time to think, she didn't have time to open her eyes and see him close the door. She was captured in his taste, in the way that he touched her, and when she opened her eyes to look up at his face, she was lost deep inside his eyes. He looked at her face, studying it.  
"Spike," she said softly. "You have to go."  
He knew she was right, he knew if he stayed with her he wouldn't to sleep, he wouldn't think of anything but her. But if he didn't stay with her, he would think about her anyway.  
"I know," he said taking her in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck and let her head rest gently against his chest. He kissed her forehead and walked out of the room, throwing his coat over his shoulder and gently shuffling his feet down the walkway. 


End file.
